Sunday, December 30, 2012

The Lottery: Stealing From the Poor and Giving to the Government or Some New Years Suggestions on Better Ways to Spend Your Money

When I was around 15 or so, around 1960 or so, my Father said to me, "the gangsters are making way too much  money on the numbers, you wait and see, the government is going to take it over any day now, so that they make the money." Well, here we are in 2012 (soon to be 2013). and I just heard an ad on the TV telling me that the Ontario Lottery and Gaming Commission earned $3.7 Billion in 2012.

 That means that on average, every person over 18 years old is spending $362.54 gambling, every year. Or, per household of 2 adults and 2 children, that's $725 wasted on the government numbers racket.

So, what could a family do with an extra $725 in their pockets?



So, what's the moral of the story. Stop throwing away your money on lottery tickets and spend it on something that will make you happy.

Happy and Healthy New Year to All.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

The Top 10 Things I Learned in Cleveland This Thanksgiving

The Beauty and I spent U.S. Thanksgiving at Cleveland Camp with Auntie Shmarilyn, et. al. Those of you who know us know that we call it Cleveland Camp because Uncle Al, the kiddies pal, insists that all able bodied people and dogs spend full time in the front of the house playing football, soccer, street hockey, and/or any other sport that involves a cardio workout. And, for relaxation, we all walk the 5 mile trail in the beautiful city park right near their Camp (or is House?).
As life is for learning, I'd like to share with you all the things that I learned this past weekend. Here they are, from number 10 to number 1........

10. Auntie Shma still makes the best pancakes in the world.

9. Birthday Cake during Thanksgiving dinner is definitely OVERKILL

8. Denzel Washington is a great pilot, but an even better alcoholic.

7. Myles and Casey are still in love, at least, Myles is in love.

6. The weather can change from no jackets to snow jackets in a matter of hours.

5. Not all turkeys were pardoned by President Obama

4.  Mississauga dogs are the best dressed dogs no matter where they go

3. There is footbal non-stop from Thursday to Sunday

2. When watching Ohio State, it's mandatory to wear Scarlet and Grey

1. Family is wonderful

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Woman denied haircut goes to Human Rights Tribunal of Ontario

It's a sad day in Toronto. And, here's the story why.
A barber, working at the Terminal Barber Shop in Toronto happens to also be a religious Muslim. The very religious Muslims, as part of their faith, are not allowed to touch a women who is not a part of their family. Incidentally, they are not the only religion with similar requirements. While not an expert, I believe that in the religious Jewish community, an unmarried woman is not allowed to touch a man who is not a part of her family. I point this out to demonstrate that every religion has its own rules, which may be unusual to people who are not of that faith.
To continue the story, into the Shop walks a woman who wants this barber to give her a haircut. He cannot, due to his religious beliefs. Incidentally, if you ask directory assistance for Toronto Barber Shops, you will find over 1,500 listings. Does she try one of these shops? I'm sure she does, because in the below picture, someone must be keeping her hair neat and trim.

Then, she files a complaint with the Toronto Human Rights Tribunal complaining that her human rights as a female have been violated. Well, I guess they have, but really, have we, as a society, sunk to the level where we cannot tolerate the religious beliefs of others, and show our fellow human beings a little respect by walking a few blocks to find another Barber Shop? And, below are 10 barber shops within easy walking distance of The Terminal Barber Shop (#2 on the map).

Shame on us.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

The Exit Polls That Could Not Be Shown On CNN

While the American election was certainly exciting last night, I noticed that the U.S. T.V. stations, for some unknown reason, probably because they were too controversial, were not allowed to show all of the exit polls. Luckily for you, I have obtained access to these Exit Polls, thanks Uncle Ted at CNN, and here they are for your enjoyment...

If you are an Illegal Alien, 

who did you vote for, for president?

Wow, who have guessed that?

If you are a big fan of Uzbekistan, 

 who did you vote for, for President?

Oh, I get it, STANley Kubrick, cute.

If you are a big fan of Cats, who did you vote for, for President?

If you are a person who illegally downloads music from the internet, who did you vote for? 

If you are from Kenya, who did you vote for?

If you are a Mormon with plural marriages, who did you vote for?

If you are one of those people with strong convictions about the tea party, who did you vote for?

 If you think Donald Trump is normal, who did you vote for?

 Just as I thought, you weren't smart enough to figure out what to do in the polling booth.

 If you are a Dog lover, who did you vote for?

Now, that's a candidate who I wholeheartedly endorse!!!

If you are a computer hacker, who did you vote for?

I'm actually surprised that Obama and Romney did as well as they did with the hacker commuinty.

If you thought Hillary Clinton has been the President since 2008, who did you vote for?

Looks like Hillary stood a good chance of being re-elected!

If anyone has come across any other too hot to handle exit polls, let me know.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Halloween 2012, Part 1: A Tale of Two Cities

My Beauty has assured me that my readership is going to go through the roof if I stop blogging about my annoying opinions and give 'em what they want, cute pictures of the Grandkids!!!

So, I proudly present Halloween 2012: A Tale of Two Cities.

In Mississauga, at our house, we usually give away approximately 400 pieces of candy every year. Regretfully due to the on going rainy weather that we are experiencing from Post-Tropical Storm Sandy, we only gave away about 300 pieces this year. I think the really young ones who go out with their Moms and Dads in strollers decided to only visit nearest neighbours and spend the rest of the night at home answering door bells.

Nevertheless, we decorated as usual....

One important feature of our Halloween decorations is the noisy ghost that my Mother bought for us about 15 - 20 years ago and is still in working order. Here it is in all it's annoying splendor.

This noisy ghost attracts Halloween candy collectors like honey attracts bees. It's one of many Blanche Specials that we own.

Now, 450 kms down the road, the Grandkids were also getting ready for Halloween.

Here they are decorating the front of the house.

And, here's Jakey showing off his costume during the day at various Mommy organized activities.

The big night is just about here, and the boys are dressed and ready to go.

But, just before they head out to greet the other Lions and Baby T-Rex's that are on the loose Halloween night, they have a little snack

They sure do love that junk food, and are so excited that they start the night with a bit of brotherly love to kick things off on the right foot.


Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Halloween 2012 Part 2, The League of Super Pets

First came the Wonder Pets, MingMing, Tuck and Linnie.

And now, I am pleased to present to you, The League of Super Pets. This brave group of crime fighters fight a never ending battle for Truth, Justice, and the Canine Way.

Introducing (in order of size, sort of), Duke and his feeder, Cousin Lisa

In many ways, Super Duke is the leader of the pack. If you think that's because he's about 10 times the size of the other members, you'd be right. If you think because his human counterpart is the Man of Steel, well, you're right again. I won't say any more, but, when you see the other two members of the League, you will understand why Super Duke is the leader.

Next, let me introduce you to the second member of our League, Motorcycle Mama Porsche.

Now Motorcycle Mama Porsche brings many important attributes to the League. In no particular order, Motorcycle Mama is the only female in the group. That means she's the clear headed thinker. Next, she's got a wardrobe to die for. Motorcycle Mama Porsche and her parents David and Jewel moved to the neighbourhood because their old house didn't have enough closet space to house all of Porsche's outfits. So, Motorcycle Mama Porsche, or Ballet Dancer Porsche, or Mrs. Klaus Porsche is the perfect undercover member of the team.

Finally, there's Spider-Man Myles.

Spider-Man Myles has always been a super hero in our house, and now, he's got the costume to prove it.

Here he is on the couch with his friend the scarecrow.

And, his biggest asset to the group is his alter ego, mild mannered Scrunchie Boy Myles.

As I mentioned before, the boys, Duke and Myles may not be the brains in this League as witnessed by the fact that Scrunchie Boy Myles came by his alter ego costume when it was delivered to him as a Halloween present from Motorcycle Mama Porsche. Thanks again Motorcycle Mama for the lovely Halloween present. 

And, not only is it the perfect look for strawberry blonde Myles, but, it matches the Halloween present that the Beauty and I got for him (on sale at Petsmart!).  What a Deal!

Isn't that the cutest League of Super Pets ever!